You Have Every Right to Fight for Love

So I asked some of you awhile ago to respond to me if you had a long distance relationship that survived your first year of college or if you started a relationship at school and are trying to make it work through the summer. When I initially asked the question I was really trying to bring to the light how people can make relationships last even when it seems like everything is up against them, but the responses that I received made me realize the heart of it... something that is also on my heart right now.

Everyone says it's stupid to start college with a boyfriend or girlfriend because it will limit the people you meet and the fun you have. They say it like the key to having a successful college experience is to be single, but college means different things to different people, and just like everything else in life there is no one right way to have a good experience. Maybe it's not ideal to spend your freshman year in a long distance relationship, seeing your significant other once every couple months (maybe more maybe less), and watching everybody else hook up freely. However, maybe it's just me, but if I find real love then I'm not the one missing out. Why would I give up something profound and beautiful and life-changing just so I can have a generic college experience. I'm not saying that everyone else is wrong who breaks up with their high school boyfriends or girlfriends, but I'm a strongly believe that love is one of the most important things in life. There's no way I would let that go.

I got two responses to my question. Both were girls who struggled to maintain a relationship over an extremely long distance and still believe that it's worth trying to salvage.

Girl #1 said: "It was worth it. It probobly even kept me out of trouble.... it worked for me bc i did enjoy college and what it had to offer, i still was social, if anything our commitment grounded me for the better....We both as though, the other is special in someway, which is why we're not waivered by the distance bc no one here is him and no one there is me."*

Girl #2 said: "Against all odds and negative assumptions, my significant other and I have managed to remain together under circumstances far more strenuous than the distance of a few states....While there, he'll change a great deal, and so will I. Growing together, and being aware of each other's changes is what's going to sustain and strengthen our relationship. 

...he brightens my day just when I thought the clouds were there to stay

...he's always pushing me to do better than what I thought was my best

...he remembers the little things, because he knows that they matter too

...he takes care of me when I don't know to take care of myself

...he still calls me before he goes to sleep to tell me that he loves me

...he's intelligent, and is always teaching me something new

...he teaches me about relationships, it's no the other way around :]

...he's comfortable being himself, but always pushes for improvement

...he's him...******************

If I would've listened to every voice that I heard during my senior year and broke up with him, I would have been making one of the biggest mistakes of my college life. Even if he and I don't stay together forever, *knock on wood* there were, and will be, so many lessons learned from our relationship. I'm glad that I listened to me, and I'm glad that I have him."*

Both of these girls have come to understand that love is worth it even if their friends think they're crazy, even if they have to argue and scream and cry and struggle to make it work, even if they know they could be getting with other people, and even if they feel like they're missing out on their "college experience."

Whether you're a guy or a girl...whether you're in high school, graduating from high school, past freshman year, high school or college dropout...whatever...never let people tell you that you are wrong to fight for love. If you find somebody amazing then, if anything, you should be holding on tight not trading them in for a couple one night stands. Unless the person you're fighting for abuses you in any way, cheats on you or just blatantly disrespects you, it is worth struggling through all of the confusion, adjustment and compromise that you inevitably will have to get through. 

Even if it has nothing to do with college. Maybe people want your relationship to fail because they don't see what you see in your boyfriend or girlfriend or because you're from different backgrounds or they have a bad reputation or for some reason they can't get over the fact that you're not with somebody else, in the end it's you that's going to have to live with your decision. If the person you're with makes you happy and that's the only thing you really know is true in the world, then don't let anyone convince you otherwise. One day they'll realize what you would have really been missing out on. Follow your heart.

Love conquers all.

*If you want the whole story of either girl I can give you the unabridged versions. Let me know.

Scrunchies are back?!!! (Cue the shrieking Psycho shower scene music)

So somebody please explain this to me: why can't this decade at least attempt to be original???

Like ok, I get that '80s is in right now...neon, asymmetrical necklines, skinny jeans, acid wash even, but the thing is the '90s are also in too...I certainly hope you didn't think all that plaid we've been wearing was fresh or anything (can you say grunge). Recently we've also been feeling a little '60s with hints of color block, mod shapes and those John Lennon shades Mary-Kate's been sporting. And '70s...have you seen Nicole Richie lately, boho dresses, flowery blouses, that hippie head band thing (that's officially last year). Even '50s shapes are coming back, which are apparent by full-skirts and high waisted numbers very popular now, and even those old school swimsuits are having a moment (check out the Victoria Secret catalog). My point is that very few recent trends have appeared to be original since 1999, and I mean please, of all the trends you want to renew do we really have to do scrunchies again??? I mean they weren't even very flattering! It makes your hair look thinner and your head a weird shape. The thing that makes me even more mad is that American Apparel actually makes them look really cute so I kind of want one. BUT NO! I'm pretty sure I absolutely must refuse. Join with me in my scrunchie strike!

Male Equivalent of Roses

So we all know that the go-to things that guys get to apologize, woo, or impress girls are flowers, but what are girls supposed to get guys in return? I mean maybe we're not really trying to do much wooing ourselves, but there's got to be something for when we want to do something special for a guy. Maybe a photo album or something, but how many times can you give that to one person? Anybody have any ideas?

The Beatles: Rock Band

Um somebody had the greatest idea ever: make The Beatles version of Rock Band. Like duhhh of course that's an amazing idea. You get to play all their amazing songs with their signature instruments in several historic venues where they've played. It's genius. Release date: 09/09/09. Somebody get me one. For more information.

Do you sweat the small stuff? To Fight or Not to Fight

Soo here's an issue that's been plaguing me: When is it right for someone in a relationship to voice their vexations and when should they just get over it to avoid confrontation? 

A friend of mine told me that she never fights with her man. If she has a problem he always avoids a conflict by immediately acquiescing to her wishes, which sounds like heaven to me, but leaves for feeling short-winded. Ideally men and women could just read each other's minds, but well....we all know it's better to just forget that. Maybe the frustrating thing about women is that many of us are easily irked or offended by every little thing guys do wrong. Guys and girls both overthink things sometimes, or a lot of the time, so when something is bothering us it can seem entirely too painful to never let the offender know that he or she did something that hurt you. But maybe sometimes it's really not that big of a deal and arguing over something small can just bring unnecessary tension and resentment. So how do you know what stuff is worth bringing to the table and what stuff you're better off just sucking up? Is there a 24 hour rule? Should you both just bring all your issues to the forefront so you can avoid hurting each other in the future? I'm naturally argumentative so I'm used to just throwing a fit about everything (sorry guys), but does anyone have another proven solution? Help us all out here.

Zac Pic of the Day

Apparently he was out and about and UCLA catching one of his old buddies from high school in a school musical. Soooooo jealous. But isn't he lovely?

The Power of a Good Book/Movie/TV Show/Article

I was just watching this movie called The Jane Austen Book Club, and it reminded me why I love movies so much. In essence, the movie is about these people who were inspired by Jane Austen's novels. After reading her books it shows them the power of giving people a second chance, of embracing love, and of letting your guard down. 

It's not so much the movie itself that I love but just the concept. The reason I wanted to be in film or television is because of how often I'm inspired by a movie or show. I couldn't tell you how many times I've watched a movie that motivated me to take action in my life. Whether I wanted to go write someone a letter, carry out some grand gesture to get someone to forgive me, or to buy a dog! Sometimes good advice isn't enough to get you to do something; you need to see the potential impact it could have in someone else's life. Sometimes I'll watch something and just really wish I was watching it with a boy so I could re-enact the kiss in the rain scene (which I could do now if I drive fast enough), but other times you just feel better about your capability as a person, you know what I mean? You're like wow if she could handle that then I can certainly handle this. Or whatever. I love it. What else can do that? I mean I guess you could watch the people around you, but fiction is a lot more interesting and pretty words and pictures help too.

People That Should Have Gone to College: Fashion Police

So I have a beef. And it is with Fashion Police, namely the ones on E! and from Us Weekly Magazine. Now the general concept of fashion know-it-alls who lash out on those of us mere humans who make a mistake that's straight offensive is kind of funny. But have any of you noticed how sometimes it just seems like they pick random people not to like just because they have a quota of fashion citations to give out (much like the real cops appear to have this summer)? Like sometimes they pick outfits to loathe that are just not that bad. Then they'll make up some stupid reason to not like it, like "oh it looks like a bunch of pieces of toilet paper," but if the designer makes it look pretty and the person wearing it rocks it then what does it matter? Fashion is about experimentation, and if people are punished for pushing the limits a little then what room is there for art or creativity? I think the world would be better off without fashion police making us second guess the way we choose to express ourselves.